Friday, November 27, 2009

#4 Q-Tips

I mean, woah.

I know you're not "supposed" to stick them in your ears, but who are we kidding?? Not only does it help with good aural hygiene, it just feels so good.

Those little guys are AWESOME.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

#3 Squash

More so the vegetable than the sport.

Seriously: Spaghetti squash, butternut squash, acorn squash, summer squash, winter squash, calabash, chinese okra (actually a squash), crookneck squash; let us not forget the cucumber, 8-ball squash, various types of gourds...I mean, sheesh.

Bake 'em.
Stew 'em.
Casserole 'em. (Casserole is a verb. For now.)
Mash 'em.
...Eat them. They are AWESOME.


PS was that reminiscent of Forrest Gump's "Bubba"?

Sunday, November 22, 2009

#2 Getting Rid of Hiccups

Aren't hiccups the worst? Sure, they can be good for a few laughs, but I'm talking about the deep, relentless kind that make you wish you were born without an esophagus.

I had four (4) hiccup sessions yesterday. I am convinced it's a medical condition.

Solution:
Forget holding your breath or taking a spoonful of sugar.

Take a drink from the wrong side of the glass while your head is upside down.
Trust me.

When they're finally gone...

AWESOME ensues.

Friday, November 20, 2009

#1: Making Someone Laugh when their Mouth is Full

Let's face it: there is no escaping this one with any modicum of grace.

Because, either:
A. Food/Beverage comes out the mouth or nose of the effected, and you end up with burrito guts in your hair. Also Funny.
or
B. Effected tries with all his/her might to not allow such seepage, undoubtedly resulting in some form of physical pain. They're covering their mouth, looking away, and desperately trying to inhale oxygen before Coke bubbles erode the entire inside of their mouth.

#1b. The first breath after you manage to swallow whatever was in your mouth.

Awesome.

365 Days of Awesome

What You Can Expect:
One Awesome Thing, Every Day, For One Year.

Beginning November 21, 2009.